New year's resolutions

It's high time I join the 21st Century, tech-wise, and so I have a few resolutions for 2012:

Learn how to use Twitter: I really don't know what Twitter is or how to use it, but, like Google which I use daily, I like the name, and Tweets, too. Plus, any technology that can take down dictators or force corporations to abandon outrageous fees, like $5 per month for debit card use or $2/month for paying your bill online, I'm all for it. Just gotta commit to Twit. Of course, I signed up for Facebook last year and I still haven't figured out how to use it. It's a mystery.

Join the smartphone brigade: I don't know if using a smartphone will make me any smarter, but it will make me poorer. The telecom giants extort exorbitant data charges for spotty service. Plus, with the emphasis on data-use in smartphones, the clarity in actual phone calls suffers. And, the real reason to have a cell phone in the first place is to make phone calls. So, I'll wait until I have no choice but to buy a smartphone, which I know will be sooner rather than later.

Watch TV through the Internet: With cable TV escalating to unaffordable levels, I've gotta figure out how to watch The Colbert Report or ESPN through my existing TV. We finally joined the flat-panel crowd last month by replacing our 28-year-old 20-inch TV with a 37-inch LCD unit that is mid-range on the features, but I hope it can connect somehow to the Internet. The options for that can produce a migraine headache. Let's see, I can get a Blu-Ray DVD player with wi-fi, or try Roku, Apple TV, Boxee, Tivo, Wii or god knows what else. The goal in life is simplicity. Watching TV is anything but simple these days.

Self-publish online: With e-readers all the rage, now is the time for any would-be writer to try and publish through Amazon or Barnes & Noble for their e-readers. Of course, it would help, I suppose, if I had a Kindle or a Nook. If I sell anything online, maybe I will buy one.

The above items made the short-list of overall resolutions. The long list includes the usual mundane things like make more money, lose some weight and exercise more.

Are there apps for that?