True to form, Oregon Republicans showed what losers they are. They haven't won the governor's race now for more than a quarter century.
Today, as the vote tallies trickled out of Multnomah County, like Chinese water torture for GOPers, the ebullient elephants in rural Oregon, where few voters live, dropped to their knees in total despair.
You should be used to it by now.
Naturally, many angry elephants see a conspiracy because most Oregon's voters live in the Portland area and most of them are Democrats.
They also blame ACORN and black helicopters.
In essence, these losers don't get it.
Oregon is a "blue" state, not a "red" state.
If you want to sleep with elephants, move to Utah. In some parts there, you can sleep with more than one elephant at a time.
Anyway, back to the Dud-ley (Do-Wrong?), a former Trail Blazer who couldn't hit a free throw even it came wrapped in tax cuts.
What sealed the deal for Dudley's demise was that he was correctly perceived as a RINO, Republican in Name Only. In fact, he was a registered Democrat in college, before he became a millionaire in the NBA and moved across the Columbia River to avoid paying Oregon income taxes.
The Libertarian and Constitution Party candidates knew this and that is why they ran. These extreme right-wing candidates cost Dudley the election.
This isn't new in Oregon. In fact, this is the status quo. The far-right and extreme right wings of the Republican base choose to cut off their noses to spite their faces.
When Dave Frohnmayer won the Republican nomination for governor in 1990, he enraged the the kooky fringe element in his party, which prompted a third party challenge from Al Mobley, who cost Frohnmayer the election. He ultimately lost to Democrat Barbara Roberts, the first woman governor in Oregon's history.
Ironically, Frohnmayer was such a popular attorney general that he was nominated for re-election by Republicans and Democrats in 1988.
Frohnmayer was an old-school Oregon Republican that was progressive. He eventually served as the University of Oregon's "best president ever" according to Phil Knight, Oregon alum and Nike benefactor.
Dudley, though, was a complete unknown, a "stealth candidate."
Wisely, he chose to debate Kitzhaber just once, on Oct. 1., but it cost him in the polls for a few days. By evading any future hard questions and relying on his significant war chest to fund a slew of negative ads, Dudley bumped into a slim lead.
It looks, though, that Dudley will lose by 10,000 to 15,000 votes. The Libertarian and Constitution Party candidates had more than 36,000 votes by 7:30 p.m. Nov. 3, the day after the election.
Once again, Republicans, and their "big tent," can't "win the day."
In fact, they can't win any statewide election.
How wimpy can you get?